Ahh...I actually like this one :) written sometime during the summer of '04 I think...
I look out the window and see a light
A firefly flies into the night
The silhouette of a sleeping tree appears
The full moon shows the glint of my tears
I hear the whistle of a far-off train
The soft pitter-patter of the silvery rain
I can smell the rain, a very fresh scent
As I think about what this all has meant
I sit here and think till the golden sun rises
And hope the new day brings better surprises
The sweet-smelling fresh air dances
And it is time to take more chances
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Written sometime during the summer of '04 (I think...):
Every night I gaze upon them,
Wishing you were here,
And every night they wink back
Reflecting off of my tear
The stars are undescribable
Flashing a hint of romance
While I gaze for many hours
Some only care to glance
They can tell you many stories
Or, like art, sit still
I have been on many journeys
Sitting by my windowsill
So, next time you look out your window
Be sure to think of me
Know that the stars have much more meaning
Than some people take time to see
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Written 7/2/04 and extremely stupid:
I loved the look of your sparkling eyes
That made me feel like I was flying above the skies
The warm feeling of my hand in yours
The great feeling that being with you ensures
But then it faded, maybe we should just be friends
I hoped this idea was felt on both ends
When I told you this, my heart sunk
I felt like my whole world had suddenly shrunk
Now it feels like you really hate me
I am extremely sad, I wish you could see
I will miss greatly everything about you
I feel so bad, I wish you knew
I might sound happy, like I'm okay
But I'm not, I know I'll regret this every day
I really want to be good friends with you
And I sincerely hope you do too
I still really like you, but I want to know
Much more about you, 'cause I met you not long ago
I feel so extremely horrible inside
By tomorrow, I know I will have cried
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Another one, written 7/2/04, and even stupider:
I know you want to know why I did it
And it hurt me a lot too
But I knew it was time to split
When I felt so awkward around you
I truly regret what I have done
When I think about what all you did
I guess I just needed to run
But when I ran, I unexpectedly hid
I shielded your great words
And became a selfish rock
I flew away with the birds
I was too afraid to walk
I know I will miss everything about you a lot
I will miss looking into your eyes, so starry
And all the joy and wonder you brought
I guess what I want to say is: I'm truly sorry.
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Written 6/30/04...this poem doesn't really have anything to do with anything, and has some
weird rhyme and word usage, but other than that, i s'pose it's not as bad as some of my others:
Your eyes glisten in the sweet summer sun,
With my hand in yours, we are one.
We have had a lot of fun,
But now, I think it's time we're done.
I enjoyed every moment with you,
You did everything you could possibly do,
To make it best for me, you saw it through.
When we were together, we really flew.
So you wonder why I am doing this,
Maybe because of that one last kiss,
That made me really love you, that I'll truly miss,
That soft, sweet, enjoyable kiss.
The one that tasted of another's breath,
The one that made me think of my own death,
The one that made me think of what I possibly did,
I really loved you. I really did.
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Written 5/22/04 or sometime shortly before:
I know it sounds weird, but
My tears are louder than my
words
They speak for my every emotion;
Happy...mad...confused...sad...
The pain starts at the back of my eyelids
A surge of energy
springing off my lashes
My eyes start to water, and
A warm tear rolls down my cheek
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Written...umm...i dunno...but sometime shortly before 4/29/04 I think...
And I've decided not to care
Just as long as you're always there
Won't you fly away with me?
We
can see anything we want to see
I see you and me, holding hands
You and me, making plans
The future is near, so I need to know
Will
you stay and love me, or will you go?
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Written 4/29/04:
I glanced at you, then started to stare
It helps me breathe, just knowing you're there
But
I can't help it, I'm sorry
When i look into your eyes, they're glistening, starry
Reminding me of the gorgeous sunset
I know I will never forget
The feelings you give me
I
wish you could see
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Oh just a little poem about death...
It is the end
I think of it every day
Is it friend or foe?
I wish someone could say
But no one is alive
To tell us how it feels
For death is something
You do not survive
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2/15/04:
It may be a while til the glistening sun shines again
It may be a while til I rename you a friend
For
you betrayed me
You lied so freely
The golden gate is closed
Where is the key? No one knows
How could you do that
to me?
Look, now, you're fresh with glee
Why?
It's untitled...written 11/23/03...I like it...
I think it's time I need a knife
to end all my thoughts and worries
I think it's time I need
a knife
to relieve...everyone
I think it's time I need a knife
to heal my crying heart
I think it's time I need
a knife
to end my painful life
I think it's time I need a knife
to end...me
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So many people hate me
If only they could see
what they're doing to me
if I could only be
someone
special, that people love
someone that everyone often thinks of
but I'm not, and that won't change
they think I'm
just really, really strange
they don't know what they're doing
what huge thing they're brewing
If I could just show
what
they don't know
what I do
when I'm blue
I sit and cry
wanting to die
no one cares
no one gives me prayers
I'm all alone
no one calls me on the phone
I sit there bored to death
it's hard to take every
breath
but no one notices
that I even exist
at times it makes me so pissed
I wish I was someone special, who people
love
instead I'm someone no one knows of
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I hate them so much
if you could see
how mean they are to me
but I have to love them
I
have to care
Although there's lots of hate in the air.
Sure, they're nice around you
cause they don't wanna show you
who they really are
and how
mean they are
I hear the shouting
I see myself pouting
Why can't they understand?
That I hate them! I hate
them!
I can only cry,
Although I want to die
I wonder if they love me,
since I can't tell
they
make my life a living Hell.
They're my parents.
And a poem sorta linked to that but I dunno if it's part of it yet...I wrote it before I wrote
the one above...
My parents,
What can I say?
They act like they want me dead everyday
everything I do
just
isn't good enugh
If I get the flu
it's nothing to think of.
They just don't care
treat my siblings better
there's hate in the air.
I try the best,
that I possibly can
It's not satisfying
sorry, this is just who I am
I don't want to clean,
or do your work,
I'm just a teen.
not a slave.
Don't they know?
That I want to have fun?
or does it now show?
can they tell that I want to
run?
away from this place
I hate looking at their face.
I hate them so much atll the time
but I can't just pretend that they're not mine
I know they
mean well
but at times I can't tell.
It's like they don't know that I have a life,
it makes me want to die,
good thing I don't have
a knife
instead of ending, I can only cry.
